Funny SMS | Up to Date SMS | Text Message | Urdu, English Free Hindi SMS

************************************************************************************

************************************************************************************

Dada Or Dadi Ne,Apni Jwani K Dino Ko Phr Se Yad Kr K Manane Ka Socha,

Unho Ne Faisla Kiya K Hm Phr Drya Kinare Milange,

Dada Suba Jaldi Uth Kr Tyar Ho K, Gulab Le Kr Drya Kinare Pohncha, Boht Dyr Ho Gai Dadi Nhi I,Wo Ghuse Me Ghr Aya, Or Phool Phenkte Hoe Bola, Tum I Q Nhi,

Dadi Shrmate Hoe Boli,




Ami Ne Jane Nai Diya. :-) :-}
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Arz Kia Hai,
Aankhon Main Noor Hai.

Chehre Pe Sarour Hai.

Kisi Lerkì Ko Mera Number De Do.

Q K

Meri Shaadi Abhi Boooooohat Door Hai.
Wha Wha Wha.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nokar! Mein Nokari Chor K Ja Raha Hon. Aap Ko Muj Par Barosa Nein.

Saith! Had Ho Gahi Hai Thijori K Chabihan Maz Per Padi Reti Hein.

Nokar! Un Mein Se Eik Bi Chabi Thijori Ko Nein Lagthi.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Height Of Confidence

A Cycle Rider Puts Sudden
Break Infornt Of A Bus
& Shouts At The Bus Driver
"Abe Marne K Liye Meri He Cycle Mili"?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Son : Aap Ke Office Se Guzar Raha Tha Socha Salam Hi Karta Chalo ;)

Dad : Koi Faida Nahi Betay Abhi Aap Ki Ammi Bhi Idhar Se Guzri Thi Saray Paisay Le Gayi
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ek Boy Girl Friend Se Milne Aya. Wo Chai Bnane Chale Gye.
Gf Ka Mobile Sofy Pr Dekh Kr
Boy Ne Socha K Mera Num Kis
Nam Per Save Kia Ho Ga?

Dear, Sweet,Ya
Jani. Jub Us Ne Mis Call Di To Screen Pe Aa Rha Tha K



"Kutta No # 5" Calling. . .
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Makan Malik-Mai Tumko Kiraya Dene
K Liye Aur 3 Din Ki Mohlat Deta Hu

Std-Theek Hai Ji,

Main
Diwali
Holi
Or
Chrismas

Ke 3 Din Select Karta Hun
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Good News ! Ab Aàp Is Sms K Zàryye Apñe Mobìle Sèt Pàr Star Plus Bilkul Free Dekh Sakte Hain
Wo B 24 Hoùrs

Nechay Dekheye!








* +
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gahak: (Doodh Waly Sy)
Tumhari Gaay Kita Doodh Deti He
Doodh Wala: 5 Kilo
Gahak: Is Main Say Kitna Bech Letey Ho?
Doodh Wala: Yehi Koi 12 Kilo.:->
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher : 2 Aisi Cheezo K Naam Batao,
Jinhe Nashte Me Nhi Kha Skte.



Sid: Sir, LUNCH AUR DINNER.!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How A Normal Person Becomes Abnormal?

How One Bears His Insult With Smiling Face?

How One Laughs N Weeps With No Reason?

How A Lion Become Rat Without Magic?

How One Becomes 90 Years Old In The Age Of 19?

How One Spends Sleeples Nites Without Faling In Love?

Come & Join
"BANK"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 Pagal Dusre Pagal Se (Maiyusi K Sath):

Sab Log Hamen Pagal Kyun Kehte Hain?

Dusra Pagal:
Tu Dafa Kar Yaar. Yeh Le Lemo Ki Lassi Pi....!:P
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Larki Apni Dadi Se:
Men School Nai Jaungi. Raste Men Larke Cherte Hen...


DADI:
Bahane Mat Bana, Ma Bi Usi Raste Se Roz Bazar Jati Hon,Mujy To Koi Nai Cherta!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Golden Word,Z"
¤Horn Do Rasta Lo.
¤ Pas Kr Ya Brdasht Kr
¤ Nasib Apna Apna
¤ Maa Ki Dua Jannat Ki Hawa.
¤Jisne Maa Ko Sataya Usne Rickshaw Chalaya.
¤Palat Kr Dekh Zalim Tamanna Hum B Rkhte Hain,
Agr Tu Honda Rakhta Hai Riksha Hum B Rkhte Hain.
¤Mehnt Kr Hasad Na Kr.
¤Mere Sajan Dua Krna.
¤Hum Chalay Duni
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fees Maafi K Lye Darkhwst:

To,
The Principal
High School
Sir,
Bat Ye Hy K Mere Abbu Ne Mje Fees K Lye 500 Dye The, 100 Ki Doston K 7 Film Dkh Li. 150 K Bottles Aur Samose Kha Lye. 50 Ka Grlfrnd Ko Easy Load Krwa Dya. 200 English Wali Miss Pe Shart Haar Gya Me Smjhta Tha K Unka Sirf Math's Wale Sir K7 Chakkar Hy Pr Unka To Ap K7 B Chakkar Hy. Ab Apk Pas 2hi Raste Hen, Meri Fees Mauf Ya Apka Raaz Faash.

Shukria..

"PAPPU"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tandur Ki Roti Kbhi Kachi Nhi Hoti,

Arz Kiya Hai! . .


Tandur Ki Roti Kbhi Kachi Nhi Hoti,




Aur Jis Nmbr Se Bar Bar Mis Cal Aye, Wo Kbhi Bachi Nhi Hoti!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chinese Larki KO Dekh Kr Mom Boli,

Beta Ye Kya Le Aye HO?


Son: Mom Ap Ne Khud HI To Kaha THa K GHr Atay Huay Cheeni Letay Aana.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher:
Tum Bare Ho Kar Kya Karoge?

Student:
Shadi...

Teacher:
Nahi, Mera Matlab Hai Kya Banoge?

Student:
Dulha...

Teacher:
Oho... I Mean Bare Hokar Kya Hasil Karo Ge?

Student:
Dulhan

Teacher: Uffo... Matlb Aisa Kya Karoge? Jo Tum Ne Pehle Kabi Nahi Kya

Student:
Nikaah:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[0][3][2][1]
[5][7][7][9]
[3][4][2]


Ye Lo Bangali Baba Ka Taviz...,
Jis Larki Ko Bhejo Ge Wo Foran Set Ho Jayegi. ;^>

:-:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hamesha,

Apni Pasand K Raste Per Chalo,

Apne Tariqe Se Muhabat Kro,

Apne Alfaz Me Baat Kro.

Sirf Wo Kro Jo Apka Dil Kahe.

Aur Phir Dekhna,
1 Din Sari Dunia Kahe Gi.
.
.

"Bagairat Kisi Di Nai Sunda"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*~ Tu Baar Baar Apni Wafaon Ki Kahani Na Sunaya Kar ~* MERE D0ST

*~ Ek T0u Pehle He Itni Tension Hy Oper Se Tere Dramay Khatam Nhi Hotey ~*
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 Admi Public Bathroom Gaya Or 1 Ghante Baad Nikla.
Bahar Betha Jamadar Bola:
20 Rupay Bhai Ji.

Admi Bola:
Kamine Main Bathroom Me Betha Tha,
NET CAFÉ Me Nahi.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Histry Of Pakorey
Ek Baloach Besan Ki Balls Bana Kr Garam Oil Mein Dal Raha Tha..


Jb Thori Dair Bad Bhi Wo Kac'che The To Baloach Bola





"PAKO REY" ..=D ;)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 Bacha Apni Mom Se:
Mom 10 Rupey Dena Bahar Faqir Ko Denay Hein

Mom:
Kidhar Hai Faqir..?

Bacha:
Bechara Bahir Khara Kulfian Bech Raha Hai.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*THOUGHT OF THE DAY*

Sceince Kehti Hai Paani Boil Karne Se Germs Mar Jatay Hain.
Science Ko Yeh To Btao K Germs Ki Dead Bodies To Paani Mai He Rehti Hain Na;-)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ye Sun K To Dimagh Hi Ghom Gya 'Fayaz'

Jb Mai Ny Apni Dadi Ko Kaha Dadi Koi Purana Gana Hi Suna Dain...
To Wo Bolin:
Smack That
All On The Floor
Smack That...!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Zindgi Apni Masti Me Jiya Kr

Ishq Bohat Buri Cheez Hy Na Kiya Kr

Tu Apna Pura Dhiyaan Career Py Mor Dy

Or Apni Sari Girlfriend Mare Liye Choor Dy.;->
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*Young Generation Ki Dua*


Oh My "GOD"
Oh My "MOLA"

Give Me One
"TOYOTA COROLA"

A Mobile
"NOKIA YA MTROLA"

Give Me A Girl Friend Of Age "SOLA"

But Girl Should Be
"HOT AND SHOLA"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Girl: Papa Ek Larka Bar Bar I LovÉ U Bolta Hai
Kiya Karun?
.


.

Father:beta Us Se Shadi Kr Le Zindagi Mein Agr Dubara Bol De To Mera Naam Badal Dena.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ek Bus Conductar Ki Shaadi Ho Rahi Thi, Wo Stage Pe Sofay Pe Bethe Hue Apni Dulhan Se Bola:

"Shabash Khala Sath Ho Kar Betho 5 Ki Jaga Hai." ;-)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Aik Jagah B.A Ki Degree Ki Sale Ho Rahi Thi,
Aik Admi Ghoray SE Utra Bhaga Hua Gya Or Aik Degree Li Or Bola Bhai AIk Or Degree Meray Ghoray K Liay Bhi De Do,
Saleman Bola JAnab Ye Degree SiRf Gadhon K Liay Hai.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mem0n Son: Papa Mujhe Gari Ki Chabi De Den Aaj Hamare Colege Me Function Hy.

Papa: Tumhari Bike Ko Kia Hua?

Son: Bike To Theek Hy Lakin Agar Main 8 Lakh Ki Car Me Jaon Ga To Rob Pare Ga.

Papa: Tou Bete Ye Lo 10 Rupay Aur 48 Lakh Ki Bus Me Jao Or Ziyada Rob Pare Ga...;->
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ek SÇhöøl Ki Aamaret Ko Aag Lag Gyi


SÇhòøl K Sab Bechay Dor Kharay Hans Rehay Thay K Chalo Ab SÇhööl To Nahi Ana Paray Ga

Lekan Ek Bacha

Udas Khara Tha



Ek Ustad Nay Pocha

''Beta! Tum Kyun Udas Ho



Bechay Nay Masomit Say Jawab Diya

Sar Aap To Zinda Bach Gaye...!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SAAS
Ne Apne 3
Damaadon Ki Mohabbat Aazmaney K Liea

Unn K Saamne Dariya Mein Chalang Laga Di,

1, Damaad Ne Uss Ko Bacha Lia, Uss Ko Saas Ki Trf Se CAR Mil Gy

2nd, Day Yahi Drama Hua, 2sre Damad Ne Bcha Lia, Usy M. Cycle Inam Mila,

3rd Day Rptd, 3sre Damad Ne Socha Mere Liea Cycle Hi Reh Gy Hy,

Kia Zarurat Hy Bchne Ki, SAAS Doob Gai,

Agley Din Uss Damad Ko
MERCEDEZ

Mil Gy,
SUSSAR Ki Taraf Se . . . . . .
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 Bacha Aik Ameer Se
Agar Aap Mujhe 30 Rupees De Dein To Mein Apne Bichre Hoe Parents K Paas Phaunch Jaaon Ga
Ameer Ne Paise Diye Aur Bola"Tumhare Parents Kahan Hain"
Bacha " Andar Cinema Mein Film Dekh Rahe Hain":-)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Observation:

Old Age Is When You Start Turning Off Lights For Economical Reasons.. Rather Than Romantic Ones... ;->
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
@Devdas Of 2009@

Maa Ne Kaha Gutka Chhor Do,

=Abba Ne Kaha Night Package Karana Chor Do.

=Dostun Ne Kaha Mobile Se Balance Churana Chor Do

=Paaro Ne Kaha Ganny Ka Rus Peena Chor Do,.

OR
=Ek Din Aayega, Jab GirL Friend Ke Bachay Bolengy:

=Mamu Zara SchoOL Tou Chor Do.. (';')
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boy To Girl:
"Tum To 14v Ka Chand Ho."

Girl:
"Sach Kya Main Itni Khubsurat Hun?"

Boy:
"Arey Nahi !!
Main To Ye Btana Chah Raha Tha Tum Itni Gol Matol Ho." :-)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ROTI V/S SMS


2003

1 Sms 7 Rs
1 Roti 2 Rs

2004

1 Sms 5 Rs
1 Roti 2.5 Rs

2005

1 Sms 2 Rs
1 Roti 3 Rs

2008

1 Sms 0.23 Paisa
1 Roti 5 Rs

2009

700 Sms 7 Rs
1 Roti 7 Rs
.
.
.
.
.
.

2015

No Roti
Only Sms
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
RUKHSTI K Time
Dulhay K Mobile Pa Bell Hoi
Or Usy Uski BV Ne Boht Mara
Ringtone Lgi Thi
Dil Me Chupa K Arman Ly Chaly

Hum AJ Apni Mot Ka Saman Ly Chaly:-)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tamam StuDntz Sy AppeaL Hy K Wo Apny Apny Result Sy Phly
GHAR Ki SB Chaplz , Jharu Nd Waiper Chupa Dyn.
A Msg 4rm



'SSF'






'SAVE STUDENTS FEDERATION' ;->
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Class One Me 1 New Bachi Admit Hui To Sb Bachon Ne Usay Phophi Phophi Kehna Shru Krdia
Bachi Ne Madam Ko Bula Liya
Madam: Jin Bachon Ne Is Ko Phophi Kaha Wo Kharay Hojaay..
Sb Bache Kharay Hogay Siwaay 1 Chotay Bachay K
Madam: Kia Tm Ne Is Ko Phophi Nahi Kaha?
Bacha:nahi, Ku K Me Sb Bacho Ka Phopha Hon
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 Pathan Chilkay Sameat Kela Kha Raha Tha,
Kisi Ne Us Ko Toka,
Is Ko Cheel To Lo.
Pathan Bola : Chelne Ka Kia Zarorat He Humko Malum He Is K Andr Kia He.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Main Jis Ki Khatir Muhabbaton Ki Har Ek Had Say Guzar Gaya Hun


Wo Ab Bhi Mujh Say Ye Puchti Hai K Such Batao Mera Number Kahan Se Mila.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Select One TYpe Of Mango

A) Langra Aam

B) Chonsa Aam

C) Dusehri Aam

D) Chota Aam

E)Kachay Aam

F)Pakay Aam


Select Kr K Ek Peti Meray Ghar Bhijwa Dain ;->

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kon Kehta Hai Sitary Baray Hote Hain "Faraz"
.
.
.
.
.
Hum Ne Tu Parha Tha....
Twinkle Twinkle Little Stars....?!?;-)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Doston Ki Besharmi To Dekho



"FARAZ",


Meri Miyyat Pe Aa Ke Poochhty Hain:

"Biryani Aalu Wali Hai Ya Gosht Wali.?"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------